You’ve probably known at least one narcissist in your life, so you know how it can feel like you will never win with them.
The truth is, we all want to feel loved. It’s what humans crave most in this messed up world- a genuine connection with someone else who values us.
However, not everyone is who they appear to be.
When a narcissist enters your life, you will feel like you’ve met someone you can trust, someone you can even call a friend. They open up to you and tell you their deepest secrets as if they’ve known you their entire life. They laugh at your jokes and their eye contact is so intense you feel like you could get lost in the depths of those orbs.
It doesn’t last long though, and before you know it, the masks start to fall off one by one.
Here are a few signs that a narcissist is playing games with you:
Ghosting. When the other person is there one minute and suddenly disappears the next. They avoid calls and texts, and won’t give you a reason for why they’re doing it.
Goes hot and cold. If they seem extremely interested in your past, your future, everything about you, then drastically change to where they act like you’re bothering them by talking about yourself so much.
Makes promises they can’t possibly keep. This also applies to promises they can keep, but choose not to, then make it seem as if it’s your fault for even asking them in the first place.
Lying or being caught in multiple lies. When they lie to you, and either deny fervently, or act like you’re crazy for calling them a liar.
Flirting in front of you. They are showing a lack of respect, and want you to know that you’re easily replaceable.
Hiding you from friends or family. When they refuse to show you to other important members of their lives, you should take this as a huge warning sign. they will make it seem like it’s because you’re not good enough or they’re not ready, but the truth is that they don’t want you to find out from someone else who they REALLY are.
Blaming you while playing the victim. Gaslighting, or crazy making, is when they deny things you know to be true. They will then act like everything is your fault and “how could you even think of such a thing” mentality rolls around.
If you recognize any of these signs, your best bet, the only way to win, is to not play their game. Don’t engage in the madness and lies, and don’t allow them to manipulate your feelings and emotions. Know who you are and what you say well enough so that no one can make you falter.